Where the Old Soul Embraces the Impassioned Youth!
Welcome to Confessions of a Classic Soul (COACS)! Are you constantly jamming to classic hits? Do you often find yourself binge-watching TV shows that are completely in black and white or are full of sappy comedy? Can you name more icons from decades past than you can celebrities present? Do you wrinkle your face in disgust when you hear modern music? Then you’ve landed in the right place (and no, that would not be Fantasy Island or the Twilight Zone)!
Whether this blog is a stroll down memory lane for you or a trip to uncharted territory, I hope you enjoy the variety of COACS. Let the good times roll and have a groovy time!
Nostalgia for All Ages
Click the Categories dropdown menu below to find articles on your favorite nostalgic topics, from 1980s music, book recommendations, movie reviews, and recipes, to decade features, nature tips, holidays, and old soul advice.
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People say they monkey around, but Micky Dolenz, Davy Jones, Mike Nesmith, and Peter Tork were actually ahead of their time when their TV show, The Monkees, aired on NBC on September 12, 1966. Now, 60 years later, only Micky is the last living member of the band.
Okay, yes, it was originally formed as a show about a fictional band, but they also became a band. The concept itself was inspired by The Beatles and their film A Hard Day’s Night. However, The Monkees were more than characters on a cheesy ’60s kids’ program. Contrary to popular belief, they were real musicians. Mike and Peter played music before acting. Davy had been in musical theater. Micky had been a child actor in Circus Boy and had some experience in music. Although they didn’t always play the instruments on songs for the show, they did sing and play, especially in live concerts later on in their career and even after the TV show ended.
I contend that The Monkees are even better than The Beatles, but that’s an argument for another day…
This weekend, as we celebrate the show’s anniversary, we should also “Take a Giant Step” back and consider how The Monkees broke the fourth wall, being one of the first shows to break character and speak directly to audiences.
Breaking the Fourth Wall
According to Backstage.com:
“The fourth wall is the invisible wall that exists between performers and the audience; historians largely credit French philosopher and art critic Denis Diderot with coining the term in 1758. If a stage set consists of a room with two sides and a back structure, the fourth wall is the invisible line… It’s the transparent barrier that ensures the audience sees everything while the characters are unaware they are being watched.”
The bard himself, William Shakespeare, used asides and soliloqies so the characters could talk, and only the audience would know what was happening. In literature and drama, this is known as Dramatic Irony. Suspense is built for the audience when viewers know something another character doesn’t. It helps the audience to be involved. If a side character faces us and tells us something juicy, we already know more than the main character.
A character may talk directly to the audience, which is what we see today in modern TV and drama. That’s “breaking the fourth wall.” We’ve seen it so often in the past decade:
Interviews, which are basically asides, in shows like The Office, 30 Rock, and Modern Family
Reality shows where people explain their thoughts and feelings after something happens in the episode
Baking and cooking shows
Reaction videos on social media where someone watches a crazy video and then commentates his or her opinions about it to the viewers
Talent competitons that feature the contestants sharing their background story with the audience before performing.
Marvel and Deadpool – need I say more?
Of course, many might hear this term and think of cinematic masterpieces like Monty Python’s Holy Grail and Mel Brooks’ Blazing Saddles. Before them, however, came the other fab four. And no, they weren’t from Liverpool (see that fourth wall I just broke there 😉).
In 1918, early filmmakers tried out the technique, the most notable being in Men Who Have Made Love to Me. There was also some experimentation in 1950s as well.
Here are some examples of The Monkees breaking the fourth wall! 🧱
With The Monkees, you’re pulled right into the chaos. The script is consulted. Recaps of the plot are given to you. You’re brought right into the puns and sarcasm. If you need to tune out the world and lose yourself for a bit, you can join the group along on the adventures!
The audition call for the TV show
Before You Go…
If you’re a Monkees fan, then you belong here! Confessions of a Classic Soul (COACS) is a blog for old souls of any age, run by a young old soul author. If you love old-fashioned things or media/culture from the 1950s-1980s, you’ve come to the perfect place! Sign up for the Rewind, Fast-Forward newsletter so you don’t miss new blog posts like this one!
Why should the end of summer leave you already missing those bursting tropical flavors of pineapple 🍍 and coconut 🥥? If we can consume pumpkin spice in August, then we can have tropical cookies in January! Save this quick and easy tropical cake cookie recipe when you want to sail away to an island!
Ingredients
1 box of pineapple flavored cake mix (any brand)
1 banana (use 1/2 of one if you don’t like overly sticky cookies)
2 eggs
1/2 cup of vegetable oil or a snack size container of applesauce (which is typically about a 1/2 cup)
1/4 cup shredded coconut
1/4 cup peanut halves or any crushed nut (optional)
Steps
Dump the pineapple cake mix into a large bowl.
Add the eggs and oil (or applesauce). Whisk together until smooth.
Mash the banana with a fork and add to the batter.
Now add the coconut and nuts.
Stir everything together.
Image of the batter mixed together!
Line your baking trays with parchment paper.
If your dough is super sticky, you can chill it for 20-30 minutes. Otherwise, a small ice cream scoop or cookie dough scoop works best. Or use a spoon!
Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
Drop your cookies onto the parchment paper. They will spread a little while baking, so place only three in each row unless you’re using a wide cookie sheet.
Bake for 9-11 minutes. Because this is a softer cookie, you may need to keep the tray in longer unless you like a slightly underbaked cookie.
These cookies are best chilled or frozen. You’ll get about two that will last at least two weeks if only chilled and not frozen.
Tropical Taste Test
Now you can feel tropical all year round? 🌴Can your friends guess the fruity ingredients that make this cookie an easy favorite?
Back in the 1950s when rock music was on the rise, older folks who disapproved it were the first to claim it was demonic and a bad influence on their children. Since then, rock has evolved and expanded. In the ’80s, glam metal/hair bands were all the rage. The men wore makeup 💄 and played loud guitars, but it was mesmerizing. However, not all so-called “head-banging” songs were all full of screaming, drinking, and lovemaking.
Ah…the power ballad – a staple of the ’80s and a chance to vocally hear what hair bands are made of…
Okay, okay! I’ll admit that my introduction to Bret Michaels was when he won Celebrity Apprentice in 2010. Fast-forward over a decade later to find this music nerd (AKA, me) who very much knows the band Posion with Michaels as frontman.
You know the classics:
“Nothin’ But a Good Time”
“Every Rose Has Its Thorn”
“Talk Dirty to Me”
“Look What the Cat Dragged In”
“Unskinny Bop”
Poison also gave us “Something to Believe In.” But what happens when you don’t believe in it? Often, if you dive deeper into a band’s catalogue of music, you’ll find themes and connections between songs. After a Poison binge session, I realized just how connected some of the band’s songs are, especially when it comes to faith. In 1990, “Something to Believe In” became Poison’s last song to reach the top 10 in the U.S., reaching #4 on the charts. Just three years later, the band’s song “Stand” from their Native Tongue album now feels like part two to “Something to Believe In.” It’s a cool juxtaposition for a beloved ’80s hair band! Time and again, Poison has shown us throughout their career just how lyrical expression and amazing guitar solos mean more than a rad head of hair.
“Something To Believe In” By Poison
Before we reveal Bret Michaels’ personal connections to the song, let’s take a look at what “Something To Believe In” has to offer in and of itself. The song comes from the band’s 1990 album Flesh and Blood.
What struck me most from the beginning of this song is the religious element. Instead of sex, drugs, and rock & roll, we’ve been eased into an image of a TV preacher. Being a ballad, the song’s slow start guides us gently into the meaning instead of dropping us right in to loud melodies.
These first few lines alone are dripping with satire and irony. We don’t know if Michaels is referring to a specific and well-known TV preacher, but we get the point. A preacher offers salvation for money but still dies a sinner. Who does he save? Surely not himself, right?
As the song progresses, the images intensify. A TV preacher almost seems harmless, someone we can forget. But when we’re introduced to a Vietnam veteran, our focus shifts. If you didn’t feel sympathy for the preacher, our vet here certainly invokes a new mood. The preacher may not have felt guilt for sins, but the vet feels it all, and then some. A man who didn’t want to take a life comes back home to find that the life he knew was completely gone. This story begs the question: Did the vet truly sin? He fought for his country, yet he reaps all the misfortune and loses his faith. Who could blame him?
Finally we hit the chorus! And what a powerful one it is! Michaels presents us with the ultimate moral dilemma: Is there God or isn’t there? What’s particularly moving is that we were brought on this journey slowly. As listeners, we don’t have to think, “Well, that chorus line came out of nowhere.” We’ve been held by the hand to get to this point in the song, which helps drive the message home. The chorus sounds so simple, but there’s so much to unpack beneath the lyrics. How can we walk away from such a profound question without trying to answer it for ourselves?
And then the image grows darker… How can death not lead us to question whether or not there’s a higher being or an afterlife? How does anything make sense when a loved one is taken away from you? The emotion has risen to its highest point, and there’s no going back. What do you believe in when everything is ripped away from you? Who do you believe in?
Notice that Michaels is trying not to cry. Cry? Rock stars cry? Hair band members cry? We see humanity here. It’s not a case of simply “putting on a front” because you’re on stage before an audience. This also wasn’t a song released without impact. It rose on the charts, just as we ask whether the Lord will arise.
"I tried all night not to break down and cry /
As the tears rolled down my face /
I felt so cold and empty /
Like a lost soul out of place /
And the mirror mirror on the wall sees my smile - It fades again"
Towards the end of the song we get a broader glimpse of the world. Neon signs replace “Jesus Saves” messages. The poor continue to get poor while the rich are happily fed. Sounds like a parable from the Bible, doesn’t it? What I love is the question of why so many lose and so few win. It’s a natural human question to ask. More importantly, what are we to do when we feel this way? Do we believe in Jesus? Hope? The greater good?
The closing lyrics bring depression and desperation to it’s peak. Michaels says he’s taking the low road, because what’s the point of the high road when you just can’t win? This is clearly not a rock song with a happy ending, and that was never the intention. According to Genius, the song was incredibly personal to Michaels. The Vietnam vet was inspired by his cousin, and the man who died on Christmas Eve was his best friend and bodyguard.
Take a moment to just sit with this song. How you choose to answer the moral questions and decide who and what to believe in is what you make of it. But it’s worth considering.
“Stand” By Poison
Now we switch gears with a contrast. We’ve gone from not knowing what to believe to standing for what we believe in. The song is relatively short, but it still packs a punch.
The mention of carrying our crosses and speaking what we’ve been taught leaves us reflecting back on that TV preacher from “Something To Believe In”, as well as the rich who take from the poor. If we don’t believe that money is the root of all evil, then we may become imprisoned by it and burn those bridges so we can continue on with our vices.
At the same time, that cross we carry, like Jesus, can be in the form of difficult times. The Vietnam vet and best friend come to mind. In the previous song Michaels was out of belief. His faith had been completely shaken, and that is acknowledged in these first lines.
If we don’t stand for what we believe in, then we lose ourselves. Michaels instructs us to look deeper and not give in to the negativity.
"Express yourself in the face of change / Repress yourself, you surely seal your fate / You got to look inside / The answer lies in wait / Resurrect before it's too late."
Just – WOW. By looking at this song as a part two of “Something To Believe In”, we find that hope. We can feel like we’ve made the uphill climb with Michaels as he navigated some of the most challenging moments in his life. It brings to mind our own struggles. If we’re still battling them, then this song can easily become your anthem.
“Stand” resolves the conflicts of “Something To Believe In”, and that’s pure optimism with a touch of sermon added in! ✝️
Believe or Don’t: Poison Has You Covered
Two songs. One band. What happens when a band contradicts themselves within their own songs? You get beautiful and inspirational songs that tell the story of humanity. Poison meets us where we are in our lives because they’ve been there, and that’s the sheer magic of music, or any art form. An artist who can connect emotionally with the audience finds true success.
Now go have “Nothin’ But a Good Time!”
Before You Go…
Don’t forget to listen and subscribe to the Guilty Pleasures of a Classic Soul playlist, which compiles all songs featured on Monthly Mixtape! You can now listen on either YouTube or Spotify!
Ladies, we’re not talking about those hairbands you use to pull your hair back. Nope, we’re “rocking into the night”, as .38 Special sings. We’re celebrating ’80s hair bands, and YOU get to help us choose your favorite!
The 1980s music scene was eclectic, just as the fashion trends. Disco had faded and radio stations were booming with pop, techno, synth, new wave, the beginnings of rap, rock, heavy rock, glam rock, and metal. In the ’60s, there were jokes about guys with long hair. By the ’80s, men with long hair weren’t considered feminine. Quite the contrary! Heavy rock bands touted the long hair as a sign of masculinity. So why did they feel the need to wear make-up too? I don’t know, I was born in 1999….
Nonetheless, hair bands have maintained popularity, even if some of them have also been called “classic rock” by younger generations. Here at Confessions of a Classic Soul (COACS), we don’t care about age. Cool is cool!!
A few years ago you voted for your favorite hair band, and we reviewed a few of the winning group’s songs here on the blog. Throwback to our Def Leppard feature (see link below)!
This year we chose 4 hair bands, two perhaps a little more famous than the others. Why? We love to feature under-rated musicians here on COACS! Choose your favorite band below by August 15, 2026:
Still Looking for Your ’80s Fix?
We’ve got you covered. For 4 years, Nicole’s novel The Music Makes the Man has been bringing the ’80s straight to you. Check out the Christian fiction read about a fictional rock band called The Steel City Boys!
Studies have shown that men who fall for a mature woman are more likely to stay and thrive in that relationship. Does that include ladies who are old souls with wisdom beyond their years?
If you’d asked me a year ago for dating advice, I’d have very little wisdom to offer. Datings apps are exhausting. Men aren’t always as simple as they seem. Upstanding Christian men don’t exist–that kind of thing. Then, on a random Wednesday in July, I clicked the “like” button with very little expectation, not because of the man in question but of the pattern of modern dating culture.
Today, my dating advice comes from the lens of a 20-something old soul and Christian who had only one long-term relationship prior to the current one. This unique perspective is just as unique as my relationship.
Love advice from an old soul…
👍Know Your Values
Keep your dating expectations realistic but grounded in who you are. If you absolutely want a Christian partner but an aethist slides in your DMs saying he’ll convert for you…RUN!
Find a balance that works for you. You and your date don’t have to share the exact same favorite songs. If you don’t want someone with tattoos but the date in question has one or two small, barely noticeable ones, don’t count that person out. Think about your long-term goals and know what you can’t compromise on and what you can stay open-minded about.
And for the record, my boyfriend does not have tattoos, in case you were wondering. 🤔
🧊Icebreakers
Ah, one of the worst parts. The old souls in the room value quality conversation, not “hi, how are you?” One word answers aren’t going to get you far. In fact, we old souls will get easily annoyed if we have to pull teeth to get you to talk or if you only talk about yourself and don’t ask us questions in return.
Hobbies and core values are good topics to chip away at first. The first topic my boyfriend and I discussed was religion. Many guys had claimed to be Christian but turned out to be in name only. That icebreaker set us up with common ground.
Two goofballs on a bus
📱Phone Barrier
Modern technology: the bain of a young old soul’s existence. They want to embrace the new world but also tend to do better with in-person conversations. It’s so hard to tell tone in a text. Even an “okay” or “whatever” sounds suspicious. Keep in mind that complicated situations are better discussed in-person, over video call, or through phone call. Text gets jumbled and confusing real quick.
🗓 Relationship Check-Ins
Life gets crazy and we all move quickly. But if you don’t stop to reflect, you can’t progress and become a better version of yourself. Set weekly check-in times with your significant other where you can discuss what’s worked well this week and what it is you may need help with in the upcoming week. What’s been working well? This relationship-centered time can make all the difference in prepping for the week ahead and for deepening the bond. You’ll better understand what your partner may need from you in the coming week–physically, mentally, and emotionally.
🪣 Bucket List
No, not that kind of bucket list. Okay, yes, it is. Make a list of activities and events for you and your partner to check off over time. It can even be the simplest things, like going to a certain restaurant or staying in to watch a movie neither of you has seen. Keeping a list will help you when you look at each other and say, “What do you wanna do this weekend?” This list will ensure that “Idk” isn’t the answer.
📊 The 80/20 Rule
My boyfriend reminds me of this rule all the time. It simply means that some days you might feel like you’re giving more or less in the relationship than your partner. It won’t be 50/50 effort every day. Give yourself some grace and let your partner pick up slack if they offer. It’s okay, no need to feel guilty.
😘 Emoji Game
Up your messaging game to personalize conversations based on your relationship. For example, use the react buttons in your SMS app. If you’re lame like us and use Facebook Messenger, you can set keywords with different emojis. This way, each time someone types in a certain word, the set emoji will pop up on the screen. It’s a cute way to build more connections. Oh, and the AI background feature can help you make a customized wallpaper for the chat. We had seahorses for a bit!
💘 Classic Love Languages
Say them with me: “Physical Affection, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Gift Giving, Acts of Service.” Knowing your love language (what you are good at giving and what you like to receive) is actually helpful, no matter how cliché it may seem these days. It helps with communication. For instance, my boyfriend has been very clear that Words of Affirmation are his thing. He needs it, and he gives it. I’m a mix of things, but I know I love Gift Giving to other people, so much so that he looks at me on holidays like, “Why did you get me something?”
🤣 Best Comedy Show
If you aren’t able to laugh hysterically with your partner, to the point where your embarrassing snort is clearly audible and someone has peed a little, then are you living your best life? The best friend mentality is real. Your other half is your best friend, and rolling on the floor laughing is essential. Oh, and inside jokes are the BEST!
Every relationship is different and beautiful in its own way. Just remember that the dating pool isn’t always hopeless. Stick to your values and try a few old soul tricks! May true love come your way soon!
For a country that champions freedom of speech, the United States of America has produced dozens of authors who have contributed to the world’s literary canon for the past 250 years. From novelists and poets to essayists and playwrights, there is no shortage of American writers.
Do you think you know your classic American authors? Take the quiz below to test your knowledge! Those with the highest scores by 7/15/26 will win a Barnes & Noble gift card!
Before You Go…
Check out a few other books and poems we’ve featured here on Confessions of a Classic Soul! (COACS)
In the natural progression of life, children become caregivers for their aging parents. Yet caregiving takes on many forms for friends and various family members. No two caregiving roles are the same, just as no two patients have the same diagnosis, symptoms, and living conditions.
Nurses and aides are caregivers within different facilities and environments, but today let’s focus on the families and friends of patients who do not get paid for their services. Sometimes caregiving isn’t much of a choice but an acquired role, and definitely not an easy one.
Who am I, and how do I know? When I was 17, I became a caregiver, alongside my mother, for my father, who through no fault of his own, developed a spinal injury that left him paralyzed from the waist down. The long-term results were excruciating nerve pain and chronic urinary tract infections.
From someone who has witnessed too much and had to grow up at an early age, here are 10 things no one tells you about being a caregiver.
#1: You’ll Experience Self-Care Guilt
All. The. Time. Even when you’re no longer in a caregiving role. The amount of empathy and concentration you need to take care of a loved one is draining. You have to remember appointments and medicine schedules, household chores, and tend to your loved one’s physical needs, whether that be making dinner, helping them get dressed, or finding ways to relieve pain.
When you find the time to do something for yourself, even if it’s to sit down to watch a baking championship on TV, you might feel like you’re forgetting to attend to something. You might feel on edge that your loved one will need you at a moment’s notice.
#2: Becoming a Secretary
You have now been hired as a personal and medical secretary! You can add that to your resume! In all seriousness, this depends on how well your loved one can advocate for themselves. Just don’t be surprised if you find yourself juggling phone calls, voicemails, booked calendars, and the like. Doctor appointments will need to be scheduled, medicine picked up from the pharmacy, and every other task in between.
Our Story: My dad passed the buck to my mom when it came to scheduling most appointments and keeping track of medicine times. In his moments of pain, he couldn’t stay on hold for too long or stay concentrated. Besides, my mom was the better communicator. Yet, she spent hours playing phone tag or waiting on hold with insurance companies. When billing departments would process a claim incorrectly, there would be my mom perched in the recliner with the phone to her ear, hoping my dad didn’t need something in the meantime.
#3: Becoming an Equipment Mechanic
Before you know it, you’ll have a drawer full of Allen wrenches! 🔧 Here’s the deal–equipment techs can only do so much, and they certainly don’t work 24/7. Sometimes it’s like taking your car to the mechanic and the noise doesn’t happen in the presence of the expert.
It can be hard to wait for replacement parts or even pay for them. Depending on the company you work with, you may have to talk to multiple people, and not all of them have years of experience in the trade. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself trying to fix the walker or chair lift in the downtime. Just be safe in your efforts!
Our Story: My father was a construction worker by trade and loved working with his hands. If a technician wasn’t coming soon enough to fix his wheelchair, guess who tried to do it himself? The one arm on his wheelchair wouldn’t work properly, and he was always tinkering with the screws to make it looser or tighter. And if he didn’t feel up to the task, I was handed the tools and commanded on how to do it! 🙃
#4: Listening to Too Many Opinions in the Room
#4 is a gentle reminder that you don’t have to accept every medical opinion as the most accurate for your loved one. With complex diagnoses, you have a right to compare notes and options. Doctors are expected to collaborate to layout the best options for patients. Sometimes there are conflicting opinions. My advice to you is to communicate with your loved one and the medical professionals. Ask questions and don’t be afraid of new consultations. You have to stick with science, but there is always a glimmer of hope.
Be aware that sometimes this also applies to family members. Family members may think they know what’s best, even if they’re not in the role you are, taking care of your loved one every day for hours.
#5: Insurance Wrangling 101
Insurance is complicated and overwhelming. It can be scary! Applying for Medicaid and Social Security Disability involves a lot of steps. As caregiver, your loved one may rely on you to do the heavy lifting in the application process. It’s mentally exhausting.
Research when you can and reach out to concierge services, if available, through the insurance plan. The more information you can gather, the more prepared you’ll feel. The to-do list may not shrink, but you deserve to have your mental burdens relieved as much as possible.
Keep records of billing statements and invoices. You may need to cross-reference these in the future. Have an insurance handbook or list of benefits to refer to as you navigate different services, treatments, and billing errors.
#6: Dirty Houses
Not much to say about dirty houses. Just know that household chores can get shoved to the backburner when all your energy is focused on caregiving. Give yourself some grace. Yes, you’ll feel guilty if you’ve got a home health nurse coming over and your kitchen table is cluttered with items and your floor hasn’t been vacuumed. Remember that your circumstances are special. You’re entitled to get some rest, even if the dishes wait an extra hour or two.
#7: The “Never Alone” Myth
Family and friends around you will argue that you’re not alone. Sometimes, though, when you need help, you don’t know who to turn to. You scroll through your contact list and come up with nothing. You feel like talking, but you don’t want to talk to anyone. You want to ask someone who might be able to help you do something, but it feels like imposing. What if they don’t even pick up?
The mind can be a lonely place, especially if you’ve got a lot on it. The weight of the responsibilities can make you feel isolated. It’s not pretty, but it’s true.
Our Story: My father had a habit of falling out of bed all the time. He hated his hospital bed mattress, and he firmly (no pun intended) believed sitting on the edge of it helped his leg pain. Until he’d fall asleep and casually roll onto the floor. Except he couldn’t feel his feet and didn’t have enough strength in his legs to pull himself onto the bed or into the wheelchair. Imagine…it’s 4am on a work day, you hear your name being called through wisps of sleepy dreams, and the next thing you know you’re moving pillows and a mattress and unplugging an electric wheelchair….who do you call at 4am? You don’t want to wake family, who would come and critique you anyway. The neighbors are also asleep. So you push, pull, and do what you can to solve the problem. Frustrations and tempers run high. There’s lots of yelling but eventually your head gets to hit the pilllow again.
#8: Social and Emotional Strain
A recap here of other things mentioned already–it’s no surprise that caregiving leads to social and emotional strain. Your social life is impacted when you can’t go to events with friends because you’re helping your loved one. Sometimes, you don’t feel like going anywhere anyway.
It’s okay to feel emotions. Each day can bring new challenges. Don’t be afraid to seek help and go to therapy if needed. Maybe you’re not alone after all…
Our Story: My dad’s pain would strike at the most inconvenient times. We’d often leave places early because of it. We spent plenty of restaurant dinners where my dad would go out and sit in the car while my mom and I would hurriedly eat our food, not enjoying it. What was worse was when people in public would look at you like you’re crazy with a man yelling in pain. Or when you’d have to park in a regular parking spot because all the handicapped spots were full, and you’ve got a man who has a wheelchair that needs to be assembled, not simply unfolded.
#9: Becoming a Hospital Afficiando
No joke, my mother has a designated “hospital bag.” When you have to take your loved one to the ER or visit them during a hospital stay, you want to have snacks, entertainment (books and word searches and such), and a list of medicines ready to go. You’ll start knowing nurses by name–and yes, they’ll know you. You’ll know the layout of each floor by heart, and you can practically be on the hospitality team because you know everything, from visiting hours to cafeteria food.
#10: Beware of Hopeless Romantics
“Hang in there! I’ll pray for you!” Really, there isn’t a whole lot else to say. Sometimes someone will even say, “I don’t know what to say.” People try to offer support, but it’s not always helpful. They mean well, honest they do. But if you ever feel like you want to throw an IV pole at the fifth person in a row who tells you to “hang in there,” just know that it’s okay to hate that response. Stay polite and definitely do “hang in there,” but allow yourself to be irritated by it, if you’d like.
“Hang in There”
On a recent episode of Brilliant Minds, a show on NBC about doctors who treat mental and neurological conditions, a main character, psychiatrist Dr. Pierce, tells a patient that 48 million people suffer the effects of being a caregiver because there is currently a caretaking crisis in our nation.
That doesn’t mean everyone should place their loved one in an assisted living facility. It simply means that help is available. Maybe a home health agency would support your situation. Maybe, like in my dad’s case, it wouldn’t solve much. The point is, there are options, and there are people to consult. Being a caregiver is not simple and straightforward by any means. Your feelings are valid. Don’t push them down. Speak your mind and advocate for the care you and your loved one desperately need!
Roses are red, violets are blue, and poetry does not have a vendetta against you! April is national poetry month, so what better time to debunk a few myths about poetry? You either love poetry or you’re intimidated by it. Perhaps you can’t fully appreciate poetry until you learn more about it.
Let’s take a look at common misconceptions about one of the most complicated yet beautiful art forms.
Myth #1: Poetry Doesn’t Make Sense
“I have no idea what they’re talking about!” is the most common complaint I’ve heard from readers who try to work their way through a poem. True, poetry can be hard to understand, but there is a hidden beauty in the fact that poetry can be subjective.
In literary criticism, critics over the years have argued over whether or not readers should take a text at face value or try to enter the author’s mind. For example, the Formalism/Structuralism critical movement emphasized that a story or poem’s meaning had nothing to do with historical context. Artfulness is more important than message, so flowery language is valued over what the poem is trying to say. According to these critics, if the poet says “the sky is on fire,” we’re not supposed to think about the how or why. We’re supposed to just go with it because it’s in the poem. Don’t worry about what the poet was thinking. Just stick to the words and the form of the poem.
Meanwhile, literary critics like Shklovsky believed that basic, simple language led readers to zone out while reading. For instance, “the sun is shining” isn’t going to move readers, but saying “a gleaming ball of joy peeked out from the cotton candy clouds” stirs the imagination and gets readers involved. Here, meaning is important.
So are we supposed to understand poetry, or what? Yes and no! Poetry is meant to be heard and read aloud more than read silently. Poetry provides an experience for listeners and readers alike. Sometimes poets are very direct with their messages and sometimes you wonder if random words were just thrown on a page. Either way, our job as readers and listeners is to be present and experience the poem. We don’t need to understand it all, and we can all have a different interpretation. In some cases, the poet doesn’t want to just convey one meaning, so the words may seem cryptic. It’s also important to understand that sometimes poets write in a “stream of consciousness” mode where they literally put what pops in their head onto paper. As a result, the poem may seem wild and jumbled. If a poet chooses not to revise the poem, then their intent may be for readers to experience the poem just as it came to mind.
If you read a poem and think, “huh?”, then reread. Sometimes it takes a little rereading to get a better sense of the message. If you’re still confused, focus on what words stand out to you. How might the poem connect to the title? Do you notice any imagery? What does the poem remind you of? What images come to mind? All of these are valid questions to ask yourself while experiencing poetry. Often times there is no right or wrong answer in regards to meaning. You are invited to make the poem personal to you and interpret it as you will. Appreciate the poem by approaching it just as you are.
Did you know that there is no exact definition of a poem? Many poets even write poems called Ars Poetica, which means “poem about poetry” that seek to uncover what makes poetry, well, poetry.
Is a poem written in verses/stanzas instead of full-sentence paragraphs? Yes!
Do poets still use punctuation like commas, periods, question marks, dashes, and exclamation marks? Yes!
Is repetition common in poetry? Yes!
Does poetry use alliteration (letters starting with the same letter) and metaphors? Yes!
Does all poetry have to rhyme? NO!
Wouldn’t you get annoyed if every poem you read sounded like a Dr. Seuss book or a nursery rhyme? Rhyme is still very popular in poetry, especially with different lines rhyming with each other. Rhyming words can appear at the end of a line or in the middle. There are exact rhymes and near-rhymes. Rhyme does not mean a poem is cheesy, just as the absence of rhyme doesn’t make poetry any less poem-y.
Many poets today choose to write free verse poetry, which doesn’t rhyme or have a strict form. Think of good ol’ Shakespeare, who used to write numerous sonnets. Sonnets must have a certain number of syllables, 14 lines, and a pair of rhyming words in the last two lines. Free verse poets still write intriguing poetry, but they don’t cram their message into a specific box, like Shakespeare. Haikus, limmericks, and the like are all forms of poetry that have a set of rules to follow. Some poets do better with structure and others don’t.
Can free verse look and sound extra jumbled and messy? Unfortunately, yes. Sometimes it’s easy to get led astray while writing free verse because it’s like daydreaming onto paper with no guidelines. You can make up your own guidelines. For example, a free verse poem can still have some repetition. It’s just fluid in the way the words are arranged. One stanza may be longer than another, and that is perfectly okay!
Poetry is constantly changing, which can make it a harder concept for non-poets to grasp.
Myth #3: Poems are Boring
Zzzzzz….Okay, you’re not that bored! True, poems can seem boring, especially if they drone on or are 100 years old with a lot of thous, thys, and thines. Sometimes you just need to find the poetry that is right for you. You may not like a lot of traditional poetry, but you may be a music lover or a sucker for mushy greeting card verses.
Have you ever found yourself doomscrolling at night and stumble across those carousel posts where you have to slide images to read the next line of text? Some of those are poetry because the lines are broken up, almost like verses. Short verses can have characteristics of poetry. Those acrostics that spell out your name where each letter stands for a different characteristic about yourself? That’s poetry! For Christians, the Book of Psalms by King David is all poetry, as well as the Song of Songs.
Poetry can also be a tad more artsy. Black-out poetry consists of drawing over an old text to make a new design and poem. See cool examples here!
Guess what? Poetry is in motion, all around you, even if you don’t know it. Images and sounds can seem poetic. No matter how you choose to define poetry, it’s meant to help us get in touch with the beauty within. We’re to grow closer to others, ourselves, our emotions, and our humanity.
Romantic relationships aren’t always roses and chocolate, whether it’s February 14th or March 14th. Is it time to give up or time to wait patiently? This deep question is explored in two songs from different decades.
Marshall Crenshaw’s 1982 “Someday, Someway” is a champion of hope and endurance in love. On the other hand, Jerrod Niemann’s 2014 “I Can’t Give in Anymore” laments how it feels to walk away broken-hearted.
Two unappreciated songs, two different perspectives on what it means to surrender in love. It’s a classic Monthly Mixtape review! Let’s dive in!
“Someday, Someway” by Marshall Crenshaw
What’s notable is that “Someday, Someway” was always a Marshall Crenshaw song. He composed the song, which was sung by Robert Gordon, a rockabilly artist in the early ’80s. In 1982, Crenshaw recorded it for his own debut album. Overall, the song itself hasn’t changed much and has aged well.
The track is simple and repetitive, but not without profound meaning. Notice the tender yet upbeat background. Although this song has been played on Sirius XM’s “1st Wave” channel, make no mistake: this is characteristically not a New Wave song, but instead leans toward a folk or even blues vibe.
Communication is at the heart of this song. We can’t stand to see our loved ones suffer, but sometimes we find ourselves unequipped to help, especially when we don’t understand. Crenshaw’s lyrics show a tense situation where he doesn’t understand what his lover needs. He can wonder, but he has no answers.
Then enter patience. Instead of surrendering with a white flag, he surrenders to the relationship. He’s not going to leave because of miscommunication. Being a human is hard. Having emotions is hard. Being a human with unexplainable emotions…that can cause turbulence, especially without clear communication.
“Someday…Someway…” He vows to understand, not give up.
“After all you’ve done for me All I really want to do Is take the love you brought my way And give it all right back to you”
-Marshall Crenshaw
Take a moment with that verse. Just…wow! If that’s not love, what is? Words might be hard to convey right now for the lover, but he’s not going to let that break their bond. Simple, but beautiful!
One last note on this earworm, which comes from the verse that mentions the couple “taking everything from each other.” At first listen these words might sound like a giving up moment. Taking things away sounds like an instant breakup.
For Crenshaw, this is no breakup. In a relationship, a genuine couple knows everything about one another. They know wounds, insecurities, successes, all of it. After sharing life deeply, day-in and day-out, he’s not going to just leave over communication struggles.
What an admirable, inspirational love! ❤️
“I Can’t Give in Anymore” by Jerrod Niemann
Unfortunately we are shifting gears with our next song, and the ending isn’t so inspirational. Yet, this masterpiece by country singer/songwriter Jerrod Niemann presents a worthy contrast to Marshall Crenshaw.
“I Can’t Give in Anymore” is the classic broken-hearted ballad but with poetic lyrics that paint an emotional picture. The bottom line? Communication only gets you so far.
“Rolling down that same road…” Doesn’t that sound like how you feel when you’ve repeated yourself over and over but no one is listening? Right from the start we see a lull in communication.
The fact that she won’t make up her mind leaves Niemann with no choice but to walk away. Sometimes communication just can’t be fixed when both hearts aren’t committed.
“Honesty is something we both swore But honestly, I don’t know if I know you anymore…”
-Jerrod Niemann
Honesty is revealed through words and actions. Since the lover is not communicating, her lack of communication becomes the tragic action that leads to the end of the relationship.
In this song, surrender takes the form of a white flag. Niemann was ready to surrender to his love with sincerity and honesty, just like Crenshaw. When that surrender couldn’t be reciprocated, he had no choice but to save himself and walk away. As he sings, “I’ve seen the signs,” there’s no denying that he knows what’s coming. You just can’t make someone talk to you, let alone spill their heart and soul.
Poetic but gut-wrenching, Niemann’s emotion is strong from the first somber note to the last.
Communicate…or Not
Communication is key — what a cliché! Yet, it’s true. Without hard conservations, you’ll never know just how someone feels. Sure, some people struggle with saying what’s on their hearts, but this is where patience enters.
In analyzing both Crenshaw and Niemann’s songs, we find that surrender can be beautiful or painful. Perspective also matters in these situations. For Crenshaw, he sees the bigger picture. He and his lover have been through so much together that he realizes this communication slump is normal and fixable. On the other hand, although Niemann does see the big picture, he’s also able to zoom in and acknowledge that, if she can’t talk to him about day-to-day things, then they don’t stand a chance in the long run.
Will you surrender for the chance at a worthwhile love story, or will you hesitate when given the chance?
Before You Go…
Be sure to listen to and follow the Guilty Pleasures of a Classic Soul playlist that has all the songs we’ve featured here on the blog for our Monthly Mixtape reviews.
An eerie mood typically follows Rod Serling’s classic narrations of Twilight Zone episodes, especially when the plot zooms in on questions of morality. Many vintage TV shows feature moral lessons, and the Twilight Zone is no exception. Humanity is exposed and dissected, often leaving viewers with more questions than answers. But maybe that’s the point. Besides, old souls can’t help but seek wisdom that can unlock natural or supernatural secrets!
One particular episode of the timeless series, “Valley of the Shadow” from 1963, sheds light on moral questions about violence, trust, and compassion. If we had the very tools to save humanity and make the world a more peaceful place, would we put them to use or bury them until society is ready for them? Will humanity ever be ready?
Moral Lessons from Peaceful Valley
Synopsis
*Spoilers Ahead*
Peaceful Valley, population 981. It could have risen to 982, had journalist Philip Redfield not overstayed his welcome in the quiet little town. When he makes a pit stop for gas in the town, his dog, Rollie, jumps out of the car in pursuit of a cat. Philip quickly learns Peaceful Valley is not a normal town, as he watches a girl point a device at his dog, who then disappears! A few minutes later Rollie reappears just as quickly as he’d vanished. Now in a hurry to speed out of Dodge, Philip and Rollie take off, only to crash in what seems to be an invisible wall preventing him from escaping.
Philip finds himself stuck in town while his car gets repaired. At the hotel, he meets Ellen, who assures him that there are no vacant rooms and all of the current residents are out for the day, despite the fact no room keys are missing on the rack behind her. Philip is beyond suspicious.
Soon enough Philip is brought to the leaders of the town: Dorn, Connolly, and Evans. They sit at a rectangular table like a set of judges, Dorn being the presider. After a lot of hemming and hawing, they explain to Philip that over 100 years ago, a visitor from another planet bestowed on this little town instructions on how to use special technology to create new objects, as well as to arrange and rearrange matter. They give a demonstration of this by stabbing Connolly and then using a little remote to heal him. They have the power to take atoms from one place and transport them to another (“Beam me up, Scotty!”).
In essence, this alien gave the citizens of Peaceful Valley the power to use a machine that we would compare to a 3D printer. All they need to do is input a set of instructions and poof–an object!
Sounds perfect, until Dorn tells Philip that the residents of Peaceful Valley were instructed to not let the rest of the world know about this technology until humans stop being violent towards one another. As a result, they can’t let Philip leave the town. He knows too much.
After much argument, Philip is left with no choice but to remain confined to a house that the men give him. Sure, it’s nice and luxurious, but Philip recognizes himself as a prisoner in this forsaken town. Meanwhile, Ellen from the hotel visits him and professes her supposed love for him. Philip scoffs at her and explains that she has never seen the real world. She doesn’t know what love is since she’s lived in this prison-town all her life.
Then Philip gets an idea. He sneaks into the secret basement where the alien technology is. He 3D prints himself a handgun, grabs the book that has all of the code for this technology, and drives off with Ellen and Rollie. What Philip doesn’t know is that he was set up. Ellen claims her love wasn’t a lie, yet Dorn used her as a pawn to bring Philip back to him. Dorn is convinced that Philip is an example that proves humans are still violent. Philip could have chosen to make any object with the machine, but he didn’t think twice about making a gun. To Dorn and the town, this means humans are still violent.
This also means Philip is a danger so he must be executed. Dorn points a machine towards Philip and bids him goodbye. When we see Philip again, he’s sitting in his car at the town gas station where everything began. Peaceful Valley looks normal again. He spies Ellen from afar, but she doesn’t seem to know him.
Philip and Rollie finally drive off as if nothing ever happened.
Who Wields the Power?
Dorn and company are adamant that the alien told the town to hold onto these secret instructions until humans stop all violence. Philip points out that this technology could cure diseases and make the world a better place. This doesn’t matter to the townspeople. For them, the “no violence” part of their directions is non-negotiable.
But why should Peaceful Valley reap all the benefits of this revolutionary technology? 981 people out of billions in the world have access to technology that could literally change lives. This machine could make food and water so no one would go hungry. For Peaceful Valley, however, they have a duty to uphold their commands. What we don’t know is if there would be any repercussions for the townspeople. Will this alien come back and punish them if they let the secret technology out to the public too soon?
This question leads to an even better one: why would an alien gift the humans with this technology? The alien, even its species, would have to have some compassion for others since the assumed goal is to help humanity with the technology. Or, could it be a trap? The alien trusts Peaceful Valley, but can Peaceful Valley trust the alien?
Can we blame Philip for using the technology to make himself a gun? How many of us would do the same? Humans may have violent tendencies (as Peaceful Valley so claims), but what about emotions? Philip was in an unknown, strange environment. He felt threatened, so he planned his prison break with a self-defense weapon in mind. Humans go into fight or flight when their adrenaline hits. Maybe Philip wasn’t thinking clearly. Maybe he was. Does this give Peaceful Valley the right to use Philip as proof humanity hasn’t changed?
In Rod Serling’s social commentary, he states:
“You’ve seen them. Little towns, tucked away far from the main roads. You’ve seen them, but have you thought about them? What do the people in these places do? Why do they stay? Philip Redfield never thought about them.”
The moral lesson here has nothing to do with the fact Peaceful Valley is a little town off a main road. What matters is whether or not they have a right to withhold life-saving technology from the rest of the world. Instead of using the technology as a tool, the residents are using it as a social weapon. They’re punishing the innocent who could use this technology to survive!
Who is more morally lacking: the humans who contribute to a violent world or the humans who could save that world but choose not to because of there is violence? Which is the lesser of two evils?
Maybe Peaceful Valley should start asking themselves if their technology could facilitate an end to violence instead of hoarding it for themselves. Technology is meant to be a tool, not a buffer.
